The year was 1980. Catherine “Cat” Sandwich, a completely unknown budget candidate, was elected head of state in a record-breaking 99%-to-1% landslide victory by capturing the hearts and minds of the country. While other candidates debated stock prices and GDP forecasts, Cat Sandwich argued that a country’s total wealth meant nothing if its people were not having a good time on this beautiful little planet.

Inspired by Bhutan’s Gross National Happiness concept, Cat Sandwich recalibrated the government’s goal towards maximizing Citizen Goodtimes, which meant not only ensuring fundamental material needs, but asking a question no government had previously bothered with: are people actually having a good time?

Soon her team of scientists discovered Goodtimesium (GTM), a quantum-neuro-molecular-something-or-other emitted by human beings in states of genuine connection, joy, and collective silliness. High GTM readings became the government’s north star.

As countries around the globe followed Cat Sandwich’s lead, a certain Playground Bureau—a municipal parks office tasked with designing and maintaining playgrounds—drew attention. It was discovered that playgrounds designed by the Bureau produced unusually high Goodtimesium readings when kids were playing in them. Gradually, then suddenly, the Playground Bureau was elevated from a humble parks office to a full government agency under the newly created Ministry of Happiness, tasked with GTM-elevation strategies for the entire country. They insisted on keeping the name and aesthetics.

The Bureau’s flagship program, MONKEY BUSINESS, is an annual sandbox for testing and developing new methods of Goodtimesium elevation.

Over the recent years, Bureau scientists detected alarming readings of a counter-phenomenon: Separatoxin, a mysterious force linked to a decrease in people just hanging out and doing stuff together. Its precise nature remains under investigation. The Bureau launched public awareness campaigns and recommended citizens spend more time together, but critics argued the response fell short of the scale of the threat.

Not everyone believed the Bureau was moving fast enough. A renegade splinter group, rumored to include disgruntled ex-Bureau agents, began operating outside official channels under the name The Syndicate.

Their activities have included defacing the Scrolling Area sponsored by Carrefoogle Corporation in 2025, hijacking sound equipment for secret underground parties within Monkey Business, and distributing unverified propaganda in tinfoil hats (to insulate from “7G”). The Bureau has officially classified the Syndicate as an annoying headache. The Syndicate has in turn classified the Bureau as a sellout. The Bureau categorically denies this characterization.

Any claims circulated by the Syndicate regarding the Bureau’s corporate partnerships do not reflect the official position of the Bureau and should be disregarded.